# News Notes (January 1973) **URL:** **Published:** January 1, 1973 --- “We’ve gotten rid of the 1921 prostitutes. We’ve put them in our inactive file.” ## We’re just wild about Harry On the morning of December 26, 1972, Harry S. (for nothing—really) Truman joined other famous ex-politicians in that Great Cesspool in the Sky. Although the rest of the nation got caught up in the canonization rush to plaster Truman’s name on water works and cowpaths, issue Truman memorial ashtrays and fly swatters, and otherwise guarantee that the Truman memory linger long after his perfidious performance is forgotten, our main regret is that Harry was ever born in the first place. Not that he didn’t have things about him worth remembering. He was, after all, rejected from West Point, at a time, obviously, when the U.S. Army had at least more good taste than it does now (although Calley never killed as many people as Truman did, come to think of it). He also failed as a haberdasher—proving that people display more intelligence in the selection of jock straps and sweat socks than they do in the election of presidents. And he also achieved the truly remarkable distinction of being the most hated president, before or since his time. But it’s mainly the things that aren’t to Harry’s credit that are forgotten but should be remembered. Like his plumping for Universal Military Conscription, and then having to settle for mere reinstatement of Selective Slavery. Like nationalizing the steel industry. Like imposing wage-price controls when they were only a glimmer in Richard Nixon’s beady eyes. Like presiding over witch-hunts that would have made Mitchell Palmer drool. Like having the almost prophetic foresight to involve us in Vietnam. Like making Korea a household word. But, with instant Truman revisionism, these memories have been replaced with those of a strong yet homespun president who wisely guided the American ship of state during trying times. To that, we give a roaring Bronx cheer and hold the passing of Harry S. with the same reverence we hold for the passing of addled dogs and Bolivian dictators. Toke him away, say we. ## Your chance to be heard In case you have ever had the desire to chat with a Narc, your chance has now come, courtesy of Uncle Sam. The government has established a Heroin Hotline, for the express purpose of making it easier for you to “turn in your local pusher.” The toll-free number is 800-368-5363. Phones are manned around the clock, seven days a week. ## Hospers landslide Libertarian Party presidential candidate John Hospers soundly outpolled several other presidential write-ins in New York’s Nassau County, reports _Newsday_, a Long Island newspaper. In an article entitled, “Whoever He Is, Six Wanted Hospers,” it was disclosed that Hospers outpolled Barry Goldwater, Edward Kennedy, John Lindsay, Harry S. Truman, Senator J.W. Fulbright, Representative Wilbur Mills, Governor Terry Sanford, Judge Sol Wachtler (of Great Neck), Admiral Hyman Rickover, Groucho Marx and Archie Bunker. Election officials were mystified at who Hospers was. Laura Davis, the chief clerk for the Nassau Board of Elections, said, “He must be somebody because those votes \[he received six write-ins\] were scattered about the county.” It was also reported that, in some places, he was listed with a running mate named Toni Nathan—which led officials to ask, “Who is Toni Nathan?” A spokesman for Nassau Republican Chairman Joseph Margiotta, an astute observer of embryonic political parties, suggested that Hospers might have been a “kid” who got friends to vote for him. _Newsday_ said that a “White House spokesman, who said she had never heard of Hospers, was impressed by Hospers’ showing. The spokesman said, ‘He has got a good leg up for 1976!’” By now, of course, the White House is undoubtedly well aware of who John Hospers is. As widely reported in the national press, one of Virginia’s 12 GOP electors broke ranks to cast his ballot for the Hospers/Nathan ticket in the Electoral College. The elector, Roger MacBride of Charlottesville, who described himself as a life-long Republican, said he had voted for the two Libertarian Party candidates in protest against Presidential leadership inexorably moving “the Federal Government in the direction of ever-greater control over the lives of all of us.” ## Cop sings the blues A New York department store, Alexander’s, annually opens its Bronx store one Sunday in each holiday season for the benefit of disabled and chronically ill shoppers. Acting on a complaint from Arthur Wolfson, secretary-treasurer of the New York State Retail Labor Council, who is apparently concerned about the store’s declared intention to challenge the Sabbath “blue laws,” city police served a summons on the store manager for violating the closing law. Patrolman Kenneth Fischer of the 46th Precinct, who was charged with serving the summons, apparently did not enjoy the assignment. As he told _The New York Times_, “I felt like a Communist doing what I did. Those people in the store must have thought I was some kind of a dirt bag. I snuck out of there by a side door. I’m disgusted.” ## The high cost of killing The United States Arms Control and Disarmament Agency has released its yearly estimate of world military expenditures. The United States, of course, spends more on death and destruction than any other nation, accounting for one third of the world total. On a per capita basis, Israel heads the list at $477 per person annually; America is second with $397 per person; and the USSR is third at $270. Red China is rather low on the list with an estimated $12.50 per person (but then China has the largest population). Overall, the countries in the Middle East and Indochina led the world in spending on weaponry. ## The Vietnamese have a word for it In Viet Nam the pun is taken seriously. Although the Saigon regime uses every trick in the statist repertoire to censor the press, the message does get through, often through satire and the lowly pun. American words are transliterated into similar sounding Vietnamese phrases “to aid pronunciation.” Example: Washington becomes Hoa Thinh Don. Henry Kissinger is generally rendered Kit Xinh Che, which literally means “very pretty human excrement,” and is often shortened to simply Kit—“manure.” ## Scalping the public Barbers in Bridgeport, Connecticut have appealed to Governor Thomas J. Meskill for state subsidies. They say their business is suffering because many men are wearing their hair long. Neil R. Agresta, president of Barbers Union Local 197, which has more than 300 members, said that he understood that other states had subsidized their barbers’ faltering trade, and that he hoped Governor Meskill would support similar help in Connecticut. ## The hooker is that they are still filed New Jersey State Police have launched a drive to thin their cumbersome files. Superintendent David B. Kelly has reported significant progress: “We’ve gotten rid of the 1921 prostitutes. We’ve put them in our inactive file.” ## Hot line to heaven Philippine President Ferdinand E. Marcos has stated that his decision to place the Philippines under martial law followed a consultation with God and the receipt of “several signs” from Him to act. Marcos told the Philippine Historical Association that he signed a martial-law proclamation one week before it was announced, then decided to reconsider the move. “I wanted a period in which I would commune with myself and commune with God,” he said, “and ask Him whether it was correct for me to proclaim martial law. I asked for a sign and he gave me several signs.” “I told myself if this occurs,” he said, “I will immediately order martial law. And it did occur. It seems as if I was being led and guided by some strange mind above me.” Mr. Marcos did not say what signs he received. \[UPI\] ## What else is new? Chinese students entered a 300-pound pig in Hong Kong’s civic government elections. Student leader Tse Ping-chiu said: “We consider an intelligent pig will do as good a job, if not better, than the human candidates.” ## As private as the post office. When buildings at Columbia University were seized in 1968, 1969, 1970 and 1972, conservatives decried the radical assault on private property. Columbia president, William J. McGill, apparently wishes to allay the rightists’ concern. Writing in last month’s issue of the alumni newsletter, McGill asserted that, “We are no longer entirely a private university. We are only half a private university. Our budget next year will be $164,000,000, and of that, about $80,000,000 will be public funds.” ## Land of opportunity The _Vietnam Bulletin_, published by the Saigon regime’s embassy in Washington, reports that a new economics law has been approved to attract increased investment. Law 04/72 provides that foreign enterprises in Vietnam will have various tax exemptions, rights and guarantees. Vietnam is being made safe for American capital. Besides guaranteeing non-nationalization, the law guarantees “non-competition except for the existing government-owned enterprises….” ## Voluntary national service Reuters reports that the Polish Communist Party called last month for compulsory work for idle young people to combat “demoralization and depravity.” The party’s Central Committee also proposed steps to tighten ideological training among young people on the ground of possible subversion by capitalist countries. The danger arises, it said, from greater competition and ideological confrontation with Western countries, which suggest a freer exchange of people and ideas. The party leaders also called on the government to take a series of legal, administrative and educational measures to combat idleness, drunkenness and “other negative phenomena.” ## Two for the road Two city policemen in Vincennes, Indiana, were punished for drinking beer in a patrol car. They had just attended a training session on how to handle drunk drivers. \[AP\]